Grow up or Shut up.

I wait. He wasn't picking up. My brother, who I haven't talked to in 2 maybe 3 mouths. I thought her would forget what happened and just say hi. I was wrong. Right when I was about to give up and just close my phone and get a refill of Dr. Pepper I see he picked up. I put the phone to me ear.

"Fuck Off" I heard him say. Then the phone went dead. I sigh and slip it back in my pocket. He had problems and I should have been there for him. I was to dizzy with the grades the girl and everything else. I get to the concession stand and order the drink and head back to the movie. The credits were rolling. Crap. I missed the ending; I guess there can be another time. I helped Bray out of her seat and kissed her lightly.

"How was the movie" I say while we walked towards my car.

I kiss him back, still waiting to feel that spark. Nothin'. "It was really good." I say with a smile as I link hands with him. "Where'd you go for so long?"

gotta goooo. be back tomorrow.

"Oh, the line was pretty long and some guy was giving me a hard time" I said as we got into the car. I couldn't tell her about what happened. Why would she want to know about my brother? She hated him, he was a bad influence. Who wouldn't think that about him? Every time I try to talk about it with my parents it's always like "Tyler you know he can't stay here. Look what he did to this family. He should never come back.” I don't not agree with them. But, I and he were blood. I turn the key, the engine starts. We start to head home. I use small talk with her as we begin to drive home.

When we get there I really want to call him, Blake back it was 5:00 and Bray and me were in the kitchen with my mother cooking some potatoes and corn. I said excuse me and walked over to the washroom.

I splashed the water on my face. I though about the years before Blake turned 13. He was such a good kid. I remembered the pool parties at 15 when he started to go down hill. He pushed me in the pool that day the day I had a cast on. I couldn't swim. I’m sure he didn't mean to do it. I knew there was something up, but if I told mum of father they would never let him back in the house again. I wiped off my face and hands with the towel. I open my phone and find Blake’s number again. I then close the phone and walk back over to the kitchen.

"Smells good" I said. It did smell good almost as much as Brays hair. Now 7:00 Blake would be asleep anyway or maybe selling or taking more pot or something. No need to bother him. I sat at the table and held Brays hand. Then began to eat.

I listen to Tyler explain why he was so late and engage in the small talk he throws at me, thankful for the time to think about the two of us. I thought about the first time we kissed. We were probably around 9. We were sitting in his treehouse out back and pretending we were flying into space. We were laughing and have a great time and and all of a sudden he turned to me, and I turned to him and we both just kissed. It was short and we were both rather disgusted afterward, but we were closer after that. More comfortable with eachother. I start to giggle at the memory and catch myself.

Once at the house, I talk with Tyler's mother. I loved her. She always made me feel at home and I had known her forever. She always told me I was the daughter she always wanted. Even more reason to stay with Tyler. I don't think much about Tyler's absense as I chat with his mother and even pitch in a little. When he returns I smile and begin to eat, lightly stroking his hand with my thumb.

We finish eating. My mother takes everything to the dishwasher as I walk up to my room with Bray. Now 9:00 at night. It was getting late tomorrow was Sunday. Sunday. Why did they call it that? I don't know. I ask Bray to wait in my room as I head to the washroom to take my second shower of the day. After I finish I brush my teeth and wash my hands. I walk out only in boxers, witch were covered in little cartoons. When I get back to my room I turn on the T.V and lay on my bed under the covers.

I flip through the channels, I get bored. Bray was beside me and I turned off the T.V kissing her lightly. I guess she wanted to go home now. I couldn't stop her.

I wish she was ready. But, when I got in a relationship with her I knew I would have to wait. She was that kind of girl. In grade 9 was when I finely got the guts to go out with her. Even though I had many other options. She told me that day that she wanted to wait so I could never push her into sex. Even if it was safe. I look up then get out of the bed.

"See you tomorrow?" I say as she begins to walk out of my room.

I let curses,flow from my lips as I walk out of the local grocery store."I'm going to hate that place"I mutter as I walk back to my car.I let ut a sigh,the sun had allready set,and I wasn't tired.
I pop my trunk and lay the bags inside.I quietly look at the many things I had bought.I quietly close my trunk and walk around my car.

I push my door open with a sigh.The electricity and water was yet to be turned on,and I really needed a shower.I stumble my way through the practically pitchblack rooms,to the room I had decided would be the living room.I flop down on the sofa,opening the Monster I had bought at the store. I wasn't sure exactly what it was,but It said energy drink,I was ready.I close me eyes a moment before taking a drink from the can.I let out a sigh,seeing how I wasn't tired beacause of the nap earlier that day.I also knew I wouldn't want to sleep on the black leather couch again.

I wander around Tyler's room as he showers, examining the pictures of us and me around the room. Each bringing a memory and a smile to my face. I stare at the one of us, about 15, holding hands on the swings at the playground for a while. That was after our first date. He took me to the movies and then we had a picnic in the park as it got late. I convinced him to swing with me. I smile.

When he gets back, I lay on Tyler's bed with him, my head on his chest as I watch the show on T.V. and listen to his heart beat. When he shows up in his boxers it always reminds me that he's always been ready. Maybe that would make me fall for him again, bring us closer. But what if it didn't? I would have given him something precious. I did love him, but if I wasn't IN love with him was that worth it? I sigh and get up to leave.
"See you tomorrow?" he asks. "Sure will." I say with a smile as I kiss him, a little longer and deeper than usual, an experiment.

Shocked by the kiss. I felt like pushing her onto my bed. I didn't let that control me. I smiled as the kiss stopped and she walked out of the room. Wow what a girl, she was the right chose even if I had to wait for what I truly wanted.

She walked out and I walked over to the window to see her walking away on the sidewalk. Hoping she was safe, when she got far enough I left and fell on my bed heart beating loud. I was truly in love. I take out my cell phone. Then look at Blake’s number again. Sigh and get under the covers. Leaveing the phone on the desk beside my bed that had a picture of me and Bray on it.

I smile as I walk down the sidewalk. His reaction said it all. That's what he wanted. It felt almost right when I kissed him like that. Maybe I could try this. At least let him get a little further than I usually allowed. It could be my saving grace. I could fall head over heels for him again. "But wthat if you don't?" a small voice in my head asks. I shake it away. I will.

I get to my house and tell my parent's about my day before heading upstairs to my room. I change into my pajamas and brush my teeth in the bathroom. I lay on my bed and think about my decision for me and Tyler as I drift off to sleep.

ooc- Faith How bough the nest day Bray meets u xD?

ooc-- sweet xD

ooc: agreed. I was trying to figure out a way to do it but I suck at thinking =]

I let a burst of air escape from my nose.I close my eyes,the monster seemed to have no affect on me.I quietly walk over to my bag and grab my Pajamas.I quietly feel my way to the windowless bathroom.I sigh,and flick on a small battery operated nightlight.I sigh in releif as the room fills with a dull light.I quickly change,and turn the light off.
I quietly make my way to the swng on the front porch.I could hear the cooing of a mourning dove,and sigh."amour perdu?"I ask the dove as it swoops into a nearby bird house."Lost love"I mutter

I wake up in a start, a nightmare. I was drowning. I sigh and look at the clock. it was about 3 30 am. I grab my biggest blanket and tip toe down the stairs and onto the front porch. I sit in the swing and look at the stars, not noticing that my new neighbor was out too.

I wake up in the morning singing song from my dreams. That I missed. Missing my dreams that won't happen again. It was now Sunday. A day of sun? Well maybe. It was a good day to call up random people or just hang out at home. It was school the next day anyway. So I decide to just take it easy.

I went downstairs after takes a shower and such. Mom and Dad were not home so I decided today I could go see Blake. I know he didn't want to see me. But, before he left that day. He told me he lived by the downtown apartments. Room 14.

I remember that day like yesterday. We were talking about how fun it would be to get are own places. He decided that it would be a good idea to get out of this shit hole anyway. So He did it. He made his dream come true. But, I guess it wasn't a good plan seeing how he hates me because I never helped him out.

I was down the stares wearing some jeans and a T-Shirt I just bought about a week ago. I slip by shoes on and head out the door. I slept in till 11:00. Great. I get in my car and drive off to downtown. I get there and head over to the door. I walk in then try to find room 14. I see a Mother with 5 kids walking in the halls. Who would know the things she went throw. I saw an old man who was problem just in his late 20s.

I get to room 14 and knock on the door. I better be right about this.

OOC: AND PERFECT TIMING, TYLER!

ME AND JAKE ARE JUST COMING BACK. MUHAHAHAH

ooc: Lmfao xD I know I have the best timeing :]!

OOC: I'm here, Tyler. Just waiting for Maggie to reply.

I run my fingers through my hair.I wanted so badly to play my Saxaphone."If only it wasn't in a pawn shop in god knows what town"I sigh,as I lightly swing.There was something about the notes that soothed me.I smiled as I thought of my old school.I had played some Jazz for kids in my Social studdies class."America is a place of many cultures"I remember myself saying.I keep my eyes on the bird house.The bird still wasn't satisfied with her cooing.I close my eyes,the sound was quite soothing.I had heard the opening of the door next door,a while back.Curiosity forced me to pry my eyes away from the bird house,to look behind me.

Carefully, I walk through broken glass bottles, half burnt cigars, and ashtrays to get to the bathroom, which was thankfully cleaner then the living room. I smile lightly, instantly shedding the dirty, sticky clothes I had been contained in for the last few days. Looking at myself in the mirror, my eyes light up in horror.

I had lost more weight then I thought in the few weeks living on the streets. My ribs poked angrily at my skin, threatening to rip out any minute. My face was sunken, a sort of hallow, dead look to it. Even my eyes looked soulless, no glint to them. I tore my eyes from the image of my reflection, and jumped in the shower.

It wasn't great temperature control, but beggers can't be choosers. I burnt myself numerous times while trying to adjust the water, and sighed, settling for a cold shower as I could not get a hold of the way the knobs worked. The feeling of a real shower washed much of the stress away, the stress of my father finding me, the cops looking for me, and really, just dying. It sounds over dramatic, but with this town... you never know. I sigh as I look around, and grab his Axe shampoo and conditioner. Being clean was worth smelling like a man.

My clock was apparently horribly off as I watched the sun come up after only a few minutes out here. I see movement in the house next door. I look over and see a girl, my new neighbor i'd assume. I wasn't sure what to say, so I waved.

ooc: Being clean was worth smelling like a man. Oh yes it is xD

As soon as the bathroom door shut behind Spencer, I jumped off the couch and played a crazy scavenger hunt game to clean up the place, tossing all the joint, glass, and butts of cigarettes into a massive Hefty bag. I was in the middle of throwing the Playboy magazines in, but hesitated, and decided to stuff them under the couch instead.

I had gotten half of the stack under there, and camouflaged sufficiently enough when a knock sounded at the door. I groaned, and pushed myself up. After fiddling with the five locks on the door for a while, I tugged, but the door wouldn't budge. "One second." I growled, and twisted open the last knob. Finally, the door swings open. I start, "What'dya wan-"

Freeze. Time stops. I feel myself step out of my own skin, and look at myself from a third person perspective, half a dozen Playboy magazines practically falling out of my arms, my "dead" brother standing before me.

The apartment was somewhat cleaned up now, no more bottles and waste lying around. Grimy, but exceptional. The faint rush of water from the shower was the only thing I could hear. What happens when those words that you had thought out so carefully for this moment, suddenly decide to erase themselves from your memory? Dead. Awkward. Silence.

OOC: Brb, dinner.